Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
