on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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