well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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