Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
