Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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