I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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