can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
