i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
