NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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