your room smells of hookers.
And success
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
