today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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