Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
