I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
there is puke in my bra ... again
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