So drunk, too bad you don't want this
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
