Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
