YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
