I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
