He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
