She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
