He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Randomize
