just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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