I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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