IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize