Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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