It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
