he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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