Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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