are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
