Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize