Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
