so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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