Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
