cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
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