Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
