Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
