We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
