Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
