Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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