What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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