He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You may now shotgun with the bride
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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