oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
