Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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