Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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