Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
