I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I will die if light touches me.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
