Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize