She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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