so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
