I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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