Texts From Last Night

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  (708): View more from Illinois

  oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you

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  (708): oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you http://tfl.nu/ee4s
  Replies (11) Good night (1519) Bad night (2893)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson

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  (631): Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson http://tfl.nu/hv6u
  Replies (27) Good night (746) Bad night (2619)
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  (714): View more from California

  He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.

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  (714): He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up. http://tfl.nu/ay8q
  Replies (11) Good night (2551) Bad night (652)
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  (714): View more from California

  I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.

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  (714): I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through. http://tfl.nu/cb3b
  Replies (3) Good night (1056) Bad night (2405)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.

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  (256): In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside. http://tfl.nu/kaff
  Replies (6) Good night (1477) Bad night (663)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.

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  (630): What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday. http://tfl.nu/1egp
  Replies (4) Good night (1614) Bad night (587)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.

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  (403): You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark. http://tfl.nu/dx9e
  Replies (16) Good night (2262) Bad night (629)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them

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  (970): I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them http://tfl.nu/6llp
  Replies (9) Good night (1715) Bad night (436)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?

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  (501): Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill? http://tfl.nu/quyz
  Replies (11) Good night (1590) Bad night (705)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.

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  (724): You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to. http://tfl.nu/ryed
  Replies (2) Good night (717) Bad night (446)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine

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  (337): Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine http://tfl.nu/byg3
  Replies (8) Good night (1034) Bad night (484)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.

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  (516): Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram. http://tfl.nu/54ok
  Replies (2) Good night (1002) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.

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  (636): Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you. http://tfl.nu/ltvz
  Replies (1) Good night (517) Bad night (288)
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  (818): View more from California

  I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.

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  (818): I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish. http://tfl.nu/82ma
  Replies (3) Good night (387) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?

  (813): View more from Florida

  Heaven. . It would look like heaven

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  (727): Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together? (813): Heaven. . It would look like heaven http://tfl.nu/645f
  Replies (5) Good night (662) Bad night (294)

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