Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Life is so much better after having sex.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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