Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
