Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize