Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
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I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
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Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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