She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
